Entrusting My Plans to God
Prior to moving to Chattanooga in September, my Fellows Director offered me a piece of advice in preparation for my first significant post-college transition. He advised me to pray about setting very modest expectations for what I hoped to learn and gain from the year. At the time, I thought this was a reasonable and thoughtful request. I had heard more than enough reminiscent comments from friends and family who had graduated to anticipate that this would not be an easy transition. Now, eight months after graduation and five months into my Fellows program, I recognize the importance of emphasizing to any future fellow or post-college graduate that one’s prayers of expectation for their future should actually be a continuous act of entrusting the coming days, months, and years to God’s plan, timing, and purpose.
If you were to ask a fellow from any program about their experience, I am quite sure they would acknowledge that the personal challenges faced, as well as delights experienced, during their program were often unexpected. Going into my own fellows year, I was not actively worrying about the many unknowns of my future. I was also not proactively praying often for the journey I knew God was about to take me on. Since then I’ve been humbled to learn that trusting and relying on the Lord’s plan is an everyday battle against the devil’s temptation to do, feel, think, and act according to my own fleshly desires.
The rollercoaster of highs and lows faced during my time in Fellows thus far has directly exposed the weakness of my heart in not surrendering the worries and joys of each day, let alone the coming months, first and foremost to God (Matthew 6: 31-34). I knew that post-grad life would be hard, but the Lord knew that I needed daily practice and repetition in learning to lean into his teachings, his care, his wisdom, and his guidance amidst the challenges. Fellows has not solved or removed the ache I feel leaving my college experiences. But it has offered me an intentional community to learn and grow alongside others in committing our hearts to the Lord daily. I have a Heavenly Father who cares deeply for the longings and desires of my heart AND promises to provide for and give me all that I need.
I encourage any post-college graduate to begin the process of entrusting the next year of life to God now. Trust that he will enter into your sorrows and joy no matter what season of transition you are facing. As I near the final stretch of my Fellows year, I am grateful for the ways the Lord has challenged my trust in him because I know that he is further strengthening my reliance on him. And this strength I will carry into each new season of life after college no matter how planned or unplanned.